2013-14 NBA Bench Power Rankings

Feb 11, 2013; Milwaukee, WI, USA; Washington Wizards guard A.J. Price (12) and Milwaukee Bucks forward Ekpe Udoh (13) reach for a loose ball at the Bradley Center. Mandatory Credit: Benny Sieu-USA TODAY Sports

24. Milwaukee Bucks

I have to give credit where credit is due: The Bucks did an absolutely masterful job at assembling back-up centers that hail from Cold War hotspots. Hats off to Zaza Pachulia, Mirosaav Raduljica, and Viaceslay Krasvtsov for having some great names, though they’ve got tough competition from fellow Bucks bench-mates, Epke Udoh and Giannis Antetokounmpo. The thing is, the Bucks bench isn’t necessarily bad, it just doesn’t make any sense, a symptom of the larger disease the Bucks have been dealing with for years now, a gritty surplus of skilled but not transcendent big men (Larry Sanders is trying to “buck” that trend) to compliment their waifish high-scoring guards. As far as the overhauled roster goes, Gary Neal will hopefully bring the residue of Spurs gravitas, Brandon Knight should have his way with most second-unit point guards, and Ekpe Udoh is an underrated defensive stalwart with a heart of gold. It’s hard to write about the Bucks. The Bucks keep trying to not bottom out, keep trying to stay “competitive” and along the way they’ve become the most boring team in basketball by leaps and bounds. Their Midwestern bench mob will function almost too perfectly as a micro-version of the Bucks themselves. Decent players, utterly doomed franchise. The playoffs will be a distant dream by the fifth game of the season.

Oh wait. Caron Butler is a Buck now. In a sad state of affairs, it doesn’t matter in the slightest if Tuff Juice starts or comes off the bench. His days as a difference maker are over.