Roy Hibbert’s “no homo” Slip – Why We Need To Have This Conversation

Jun 1, 2013; Indianapolis, IN, USA; Indiana Pacers point guard George Hill (3) hugs center Roy Hibbert (left) after game six of the Eastern Conference finals of the 2013 NBA Playoffs against the Miami Heat at Bankers Life Fieldhouse. The Pacers won 91-77. Mandatory Credit: Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sports

While chatting with the press after an impressive Game 6 victory that tied the series 3-3, Indiana Pacers Center Roy Hibbert decided it was a good time to drop some bombs.

“The momentum could have shifted right there if [James] got an easy dunk,” Hibbert said. “There was what — was it Game 3 here? I really felt that I let Paul down in terms of having his back when LeBron was scoring in the post or getting to the paint, because they stretched me out so much. No homo.”

To strip this of all hyperbole, “no homo” is an offensive pair of words, and Hibbert’s lamentable public outburst (including also calling out the media for not better admiring his defensive supremacy) has generated both condemnation and support. Some have opined that it is no big deal, and it seems certain that within this group a subset of people will actually applaud this kind of talk. Others believe it a monumental misstep, worthy of a cavalcade of fines, suspensions, perhaps re-programming. When the gamut of the discourse runs from The Nation to truly deplorable twitter trolls, you know you’re going to find the raw grimy truth somewhere in the middle of the miasma.

No homo is a deeply offensive and regressive term. Its casual use has blinded us to the troubling root of what it purports. A simple pithy phrase automatically erases any trace of “gayness” from you. “Homo” here of course denotes something gross, unpleasant, something other. Those of us who are straight might never stop to think about the subtle dismantling of a person’s identity inherent in those two simple words. To ignore that, or to not want to have this conversation would be a mistake. Likewise, to call for Hibbert’s head, to line him up against a wall, I believe that too would be a mistake. What I find encouraging in this mostly negative conversation, is that this is being treated as a big deal. Ten years ago this would almost certainly have been swept under the rug, or perhaps not even noticed. Perhaps we owe the newfound scrutiny of matters of homophobia to the recent coming out of Jason Collins, but it seems to me that it is bigger than that, and that a corner has been turned, and that though incremental and aggravating, progress is being made. But progress is the journey, not the destination, and small moments like these are only small moments unless we attempt to work towards a bigger moment.

It is disappointing to see such a promising and sincerely interesting athlete like Hibbert stumble into such hurtful territory. Hibbert is an engaging and lively presence, an often hilarious tweeter, and a multiple guest-star on one of my favorite shows, Parks And Recreation. He is a huge fan of Jean-Ralphio! Big Roy is not then, the stereotype of a bruising humorless NBA thug (a strangely persistent caricature) but a layered weirdo who locks down on D and likes some dorky things. In other words, a person, and like most, a person very capable of saying the exact wrong thing.

Hibbert’s words will momentarily overshadow the truly unlikely and Herculean effort put forth by the Indiana Pacers, a team many people have not thought about since the 90s. This team is anything but flashy, exudes a kind of menacing working class street fighting toughness, and has pushed the defending champs and the greatest player in the universe, LeBron James, to the brink. One more win and the Pacers are in the NBA Finals. They owe much of their success to Roy Hibbert, who is just too big and too strong for the overmatched Miami big men to shut down. This may be Paul George’s moment on the big stage, but Roy Hibbert is the clear 1a storyline, and he’s made the most of his time in the spotlight. And then he went off-script. A lot of athletes tend to go off-script, whether in game, and certainly in post game press conferences, when candor occasionally surfaces, sometimes uncomfortably.

But no homo? Right after Jason Collins bravely made history and came out as gay? Right after clear progress was being forged on this front and the NBA rightly pledged to keep their league a place that refuses to tolerate discrimination? There is never a good time for this kind of softball homophobia. But perhaps the context of Hibbert’s remark can offer clues to what kind of outrage is appropriate. Calling an NBA game is rife with innuendos. “Penetration”, “getting inside”, etc, all that stuff little boys and girls like to giggle at.  Depending on the announcer, it’s not unreasonable (though it may be unfortunate) that a person will shout “That’s what she said!” several times over the course of 48 minutes of play. Roy Hibbert opted for no homo. He made a mistake, and he made it in front of the bright lights. We love a good scandal, we love a good story, and we love breaking a person almost as much as we love redeeming one.

In almost no situation do I find it proper to take the part of the oppressor against the oppressed. To defend the millionaire and justify homophobic slurs on the surface of it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Because no homo is not only an insensitive remark, it is something that goes deeper and lasts longer. It is something that upon just the tiniest reflection should probably never be said. No homo is discrimination, no homo is reductionism, no homo is something that in myriad subtle ways, tears humanity down, no homo is what makes your friends and family afraid to come out, afraid to confide in you. But–and this is entirely the opinion of one person who has made one too many mistakes with words–it is not a manifestation of Roy Hibbert’s malicious intent as much as it is an extension of our crass and often hateful society; a society that inoculates itself from the worst parts of our existence with humor, sometimes a humor that polite society would certainly dub “despicable.” I think we’ve all probably sat politely through rape jokes, dead baby jokes, gay jokes, racist jokes, and depending on the severity, struck them down or just kind of waited out the unpleasantness. This is not to say that Roy Hibbert gets a pass because our society is gross, only that perhaps as we disapprove, we can also seek an understanding.

Hibbert issued an apology on Sunday (whether he himself wrote it is up for debate). He has reached out to Jason Collins via Twitter, and clearly knows he has done wrong. Should he be fined? I believe so. NBA players are fined for basically everything that deviates from either playing basketball or being silent on every matter tangentially related to them. Opinions are discouraged, chatter is smothered, and in that tradition, hate speech of any kind is not tolerated. Hibbert’s comment surely qualifies as worthy of a fine. It came from a tradition of dehumanization, intolerance, and fear.

But should Roy Hibbert be suspended for Game 7? I don’t know if there is an easy answer to that. My opinion is that he should not be suspended, but it is a testament to how far we’ve come that we are having this conversation. It is a conversation that is necessary to have.