Standing 6-foot-8, from St. Vincent-St. Mary in Akron, Ohio – NOT Cleveland – and making his second homecoming to the floor in front of a city that hates his guts: LeBron James.
…wait, where is he?
Yes, LeBum was at it again last night.
Beginning earlier in the morning, (insert name here) was late for the cHeat’s shoot-around after being delayed on his way into the parking garage underneath the Quicken Loans Arena.
From ESPN.com:
“Cavs spokesman Tad Carper said visiting NBA players are not normally given private car access to the underground garage, but exceptions are made when requests are made in advance.
James, who regularly used a driver when going to shootarounds when he was a member of the Cavs, did not have permission.”
First of all, props to the security guard for not giving in. I read that story yesterday afternoon and thought it was great. But then I worried a little bit that maybe that would make (insert name here) upset and he’d come out and absolutely kick our butts again.
He, then, showed up to the arena wearing a t-shirt that read: Long Live the King. Now I cannot figure this out, so please help me understand: Is he stupid? Is he oblivious? Or is he just that arrogant? What in the world could possibly allow him to believe that the self-proclaimed king lives anywhere other than South Beach.
From CBS Sports:
“LeBron told reporters post-game that he missed the introductions because he was in the bathroom. No, we’re not kidding. From the South Florida Sun-Sentinel: “I was using the rest room. Am I allowed to do that?”
Well, yes, LeBrron, you are. But we’re also allowed to believe that is a totally absurd answer considering you’ve been in the league for coming up on eight years and have been in hundreds of lineup introductions. When you have to go, you have to go, but this doesn’t really fly considering he then dropped a triple-double.”
The Cavs then went out and took it to their friend turned foe. They handled the cHeat rather seamlessly, leading by 23 points at one point. Cleveland finished the evening with a 102-90 victory in a game that security guards after the game said they “will be talking about all summer.”
Following the game, (insert name here) again told reporters that he hopes his jersey will some day be retired in Cleveland.
Please, hold the laughter.
Again, I ask: Is he stupid? Is he oblivious? Or is he just that arrogant?
His Wine & Gold jersey will never hang from the rafters of the Quicken Loans Arena. Ever.
That space is reserved for people who sincerely care about the organization and the city. It is reserved for great players and great people, on and off the floor. That is not LeBron James. And I would much rather see the No. 1 hanging from the rafters than I would the No. 23.
Either way, last night was an incredible night for Cavs fans across the world. And forgive me from stealing a line from Dan Gilbert’s book but, LeTool:
NOT IN OUR GARAGE!