After a mix up at the post office, I was able to get my hands on Chris Grant’s Christmas list to Santa. Although my initial reaction to send it to the North Pole, I couldn’t help myself but take a look at it and see what was on it:
More Masks—-Wearing them have been popular with my players. They’re like Furbys; everyone wants one. But my training staff has no more to hand out. First it was Tyler Zeller taking an elbow to the cheek from DeAndre Jordan (naughty list), then Tristan Thompson messed up his nose and last week Kyrie smacked his jaw on the ground; which the mask doesn’t even really cover the jaw, we just felt like it was necessary. Waiters came back Tuesday night from his ankle injury and we didn’t have a mask to give him; again, the mask doesn’t cover the injury, we just feel like it’s necessary. So if you could send some that would be great, preferably black. Everyone seemed to like the black one.
A Veteran Player—-Having a young team is a popular thing nowadays, and that is exactly what I have right now. I chose to not resign our two most veteran players from last year, Antawn Jamison and Anthony Parker. I replaced those two guys with two rookies who have done well, but aren’t replacing them like I was hoping. The emergence of Anderson Varejao has made me really regret not signing more veteran this offseason. Then again, I did sign C.J. Miles (who recently went from the naughty list to nice list), and up until last week, he couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat. He was suppose to be my key free agent signing this offseason, that’s really backfired.
More Draft Picks—-If I have learned anything in my 12 years of working for two different NBA teams, it’s that you never can have enough draft picks. I have racked up an abundance of them in my time in Cleveland as General Manager. I am even willing to trade Daniel Gibson and even Varejao. Coach Scott recently called him the best center in the Eastern Conference, but I do not see him in our future. He has been a saint here in Cleveland and he deserves to be playing for a team competing for a championship. If you can bring me a package, preferably one that contains multiple draft picks, I will ship him out.
Get The U.S. Attorney’s Office Off Our Case—-We have been taking major heat for not having the most accessible arena for out wheelchair guest. But honestly, were trying our best. It’s not my fault when Gordon Gund made this arena he wasn’t thinking of handicap people. But we will get to it as soon as we can while my boss, Dan Gilbert (nice list), is building his giant piggy bank/casino. In January we are creating more than 100 more handicap seats amongst other things.
A Personality For My Head Coach—-Look…Gilbert, Scott and myself are in this together, and we believe in our system. We’re the three best friends that anyone can have, but Scott needs some kind of emotion on the bench. I think he is doing a great job, but he is too monotone and I don’t think he shows his anger or excitement well. I never know what kind of mood he is in, and never know if he thinks the team played well or not. Some sort of personality would be great. If you could bring in a Phil Jackson “Zen Master” personality, that would be fantastic.